Helzberg Diamonds...

...does not stand behind their work. 3 years after having my engagement ring soldered to my wedding band - my diamond falls out. It may not have been the biggest diamond, but I can assure you - you won't find a diamond on just anyone's fingers with higher grades than this one. Someone is either already lucky or will be when they go get it appraised. It truely and sincerely breaks my heart that the very diamond my husband surprised me with...went to my parents house to ask for my hand in marriage with...the diamond I was so excited to call home about when he proposed - is forever gone from my life. And Helzberg refuses to replace it. If I built a house, I'd have to stand behind it. Regardless of any conditions. If it fell down, I'd be to blame. So, yes I blame YOU Helzberg Diamonds. You suck. You have broken my heart and taken from me something that will never be replaced, because you do crappy work. The end.

Snow Between the Toes is Never Comfortable

Last night it snowed.


This means a sad point of the year for me. One that I never look forward to. One that I wrestle with - should I? Or shouldn't I?



The Retirement of Impractical Shoes



"You want to fall in love with a shoe, go ahead. A shoe can't love you back, but, on the other hand, a shoe can't hurt you too deeply either. And there are so many nice-looking shoes."~Allan Sherman

You Say Tomato...

Piper has certain words she uses that only Brian and I understand. I swore I'd always correct her speech so as to avoid this. I also swore to not be a naggy mother. So - whatever. When she's naked she says "NAKEN!" When she doesn't like something "NO LIKE IT!" When she wants the light on or off she says "E-YIGHT ON!" or "E-YIGHT OFF!" I have no idea why she pronounces her "L's" as "Y's"? Maybe Brian or I have a little Spanish flair about us that we didn't know about? Her favorite band is "TALLIKA!" (Metallica). "SHOE PHONES" are Head Phones. I got sick of listening to the "BOO BOPS" (Doodlebops) every morning so she listens to them through headphones on her way to Gigi's so I can hear the morning news on WLS. At night she wants to watch "FIFFORD" (Clifford) or "P PETS" (Wonder Pets). Grandpa became "POO PA".

I know her speech is fine. She heard the word "douchebag" on My Name is Earl the other night - and repeated it perfectly. Over and over AND OVER again. My only hope is that she doesn't whip that out in the middle of church. *Shudder* She also said "Peytonn Manning" clear as a bell last night. As well as "Indianapolis."

She also has this obsession with Moose. She says she's looking for Moose. Moose is in the back yard. SHHHH Moose is sleeping. When you ask her what her Moose's name is - "FIVE" is what she says. Every time. So I guess she has an imaginary friend named Five that is a Moose. I have come to the conclusion, however, that Moose isn't imaginary - it's my great uncle's angel watching over her. I know that sounds weird but his nickname was Moose. Piper has never seen a Moose in real life - we do not hold daily conversations about the animal - and she bears no toys that are Moose's or resemble a Moose. She saw a Moose on TV the other day and jumped up and said MOOSE!!! She knows what a Moose is. So, Moose, you're welcome at our house anytime.

I worry constantly that I work too much - that she thinks mommy lives behind her laptop. That I don't play with her enough or teach her enough. She can spell her name and count to five. Although I'm sure this is purely from memorization and she doesn't actually KNOW what "Three" means yet. But she's growing so fast, and getting smarter by the day.

When she doesn't get what she want she cries. When I tell her "OH Piper, that's a fake cry..." She says "Mommy. Tears. Look." And then she proceeds to get whatever it was she wanted in the first place...

The Best Journey Always Takes Us Home

Brian and I have officially and seriously begun house hunting. Yeah, yeah we've been "house hunting" for seven years now. But it always ended the same way - me loving a house and Brian finding something horribly wrong with it (It's only got a one acre! It's not out in the boonies enough! The 8,000 square ft pole barn doesn't have insulation or a floor drain! The garage will not fit 2 trucks, 2 four wheelers, 1 harley, and a plethora of tools! The grass does not look good when it blows westward.) But, after 30 years I think he finally realizes that his dream home/property can not be found in LaPorte County for under at least half a million. And we, my friends, are not spending half a mil on a HOUSE. Or anything. Ever. I think even if I win the lottery we'll spend it not on a house. Everyone always says "I'll build my dream house!" What on earth do you need 17 bathrooms for? If you need 17 bathrooms in your home I think maybe you need to see a Gastroenterologist.

So, along with house hunting, I've been decorating. Mentally, only of course. If I find good deals on things, I'll pick them up. So far I've only gotten a shower curtain. I had an awesome quilt/duvet in my cart on Overstock but I waited too long and it sold out. *BOOOO* Anyways - here's the shower curtain. Love it! Want to paint the walls that green color. White ceramic tile floor. I think a black shower and sink would look pretty sweet too. But, again, I don't want to dump a ton of money in a 8x8 room.

I will post more niftiness when I find it. Our master bedroom will have rust colored walls, black refinished antique furniature, and grey carpet. I want a nice black and white quilt - perhaps something with a funky design. Nothing that says Harley on it. Just something black and white with rust colored sateen sheets. We found some super awesome black and white antique-looking canvas' at the Harley-Davidson Museum. I do not want skulls in my boudoir decor. I don't want skulls...such as this:

Or anything containing dreamcatchers, eagles, or Yosemite Sam. I like antique old school motorcycle black and whites.

=

So, that's all the ideas I have for right now. I talked to a lady this weekend who has a carpenter that will make us a harvest table for $500-$600. I've found them online for around $7k. More than I will ever want to spend on a kitchen table. She said she hasn't seen them go for less than $1k at auctions. So, I think the carpenter route is the way to go. He only builds spring-fall. We pick the wood, finish, and stain. So that is neat. I'm thinking I want our initials carved in the bottom, so it will be a family heirloom eventually. This is a harvest table, by the way. My Aunt Kathe had one when I was younger and I've always wanted one. (Only with benches on both sides, and not that long - I'm assuming our kitchen won't be able to accomodate a 17' table.)

Trick or Treat Event 2 of 3

Tonight is LaPorte's trick or treat. This morning was our church's Trunk or Treat. Between event #1 and event #2 there should have been a nap. I'm in hour #4 of trying to get her to take a nap. Coming up with this equation...
Grumpy Child + Monkey Costume = Parent Commited to Psych Ward (squared)

With this Ring...RING? WHAT RING?

I'm a little devistated right now. My diamond fell out of my ring. I have no long, interesting, witty story how it was lost. I just know it's not there anymore. Helzburg really hasn't been a help. I just thought I'd contribute to the blog, which has turned into nothing but a documentation of a string of lousy freakin luck.

But. I have Brian and Piper and my good health. And no diamond could replace that, on my finger or in my heart. *Sappy sappy*

An Elephant Never Forgets

Brian's truck (Bless the piece of crap) has been having trouble starting. So. We took it into Pine. (So it's only what? Ten times it's been there in the past 3 weeks)...They said it needed a new fuel pump and fuel filter, to the tune of $900.

When Brian called to tell me this I about fell over. Then I got a little mad. Then it all came back to me...This fateful day replayed in my mind:


That was the day back in oh I don't know 2003? That Brian's fuel pump went out. They said -and-I-quote- "This has a lifetime warranty on it, so if it ever goes out again, we will replace it for free. But, fuel pumps never go out twice on vehicles." Two days later? Truck wouldn't start. Guess what? Faulty fuel pump. Fuel Pump #3 has lasted us thus far - now we need a new one. Thank GOD I remembered this (and had photos to prove it!).

So, the "Lifetime Warranty" coupled with the "Shenanigans le Pine Chevrolet" in previous weeks - $900...taken care of.

So, this just goes to prove the fact that I never forget ANYTHING. Sometimes it comes in handy, and sometimes it's just annoying.

If it weren't for bad luck...

Some say I should be a writer - and write a book of all the tales our family has to tell. Some say I should've been a comedian - a regular on SNL. However, most tell me I should just crawl into a hole and wait until my luck changes, because damn - I'm afraid to ask the age-old question "What else could go wrong?" So, not only will I use this blog to update you on family events and updates - but I'm also going to exercise my (non-existant) writing skills and fill you in about just what it is I call "luck" - or lack thereof.

I have about 10 stories I could start with for this week alone. My dog eating a whole loaf of pumpkin bread, a whole container of cookies, and a breakfast sandwich. My daughter getting stung by a bee, then getting her finger caught in a swing chain. Or the 3 month old "allergies" I've been experiencing, which in fact were a nasty sinus infection. There's also the story about our eventful Wednesday, when Brian was on his way to take his exam for the DNR and forgot his transcripts and had to drive all the way back to get them (from Plymouth...). But today, I will just start with what has happened on today, October 10th.

About two years ago Brian's windsheild on his 2001 Silverado broke. For those of you that know Brian know he's extremely anal about his vehicles and of course, this pretty much ruined his week. So, he goes to get it fixed. They do a crappy job. The windshield leaks air. In typical Frank form, we have to go have something re-done that we've already paid to have done RIGHT the first time. (The moral of this whole blog is just that...getting it done right the first time!)

Time passes, Brian notices rust around the top of his windshield. He concludes that whoever cut the seal, also must have nicked the paint, causing it to rust. Certainly it isn't Brians fault - he takes care of his vehicles better than most take care of their children. He washes, waxes, baby talks and garages his truck whenever possible. Sometimes, I think if they made a bed larger than a king size, we'd have the truck in bed with us. He calls the windshield place - they take no blame (of course!). So we're S.O.L.

He takes it to Pine Chevrolet in LaPorte. The body shop guy says for $200 they will fix it. That's exactly what he says "For a couple hundred we will fix it." He didn't go into detail, only promised he'd fix it. So, we him-hawed around for a few weeks and finally last week Brian got it fixed. Well, we thought so.

Monday it rained. Hard. Not only did it rain OUTSIDE Brian's truck but it rained INSIDE - through the windshield. So, of course he called and complained. Their service manager started screaming at Brian. Brian, not one to tolerate this, hung up and called back the owner of the company.

Long story short - they refixed it. For free. Upon refixing this. They realized that the original windsheild place never glued the windsheild in place (nice!). Pine proceeded to fix it. They also proceeded to cut his XM wire and jack up his windshield wipers. I've never seen him so mad in all my life!!! Oh he was festerin'!

The guys there apologized profusely - fixed it AGAIN.

Long story short...if you can't do something right the first time - there's always next time! Right? Sheesh!